Saying goodbye to Minnesota, family

The day I’ve had my phone counting down to on its home screen for the past three weeks has arrived. This paper is publishing on the day I will be heading to Colorado and saying my goodbyes to Minnesota and Waseca. 

 

It feels odd that the day which marks such a change in my life has made its appearance. I’ve been thinking about this for so long that it will be strange to go from, “I will be moving to Denver,” to “I live in Denver.” 

 

Another big change for me will be moving in with my boyfriend. I don’t have a brother, so I’ve never experienced what it’s like to adapt to a guy’s habits. (I don’t think my father counts, at least not in the way I mean right now.) It will be interesting to see what it’s like to share everything with only the two of us living symbiotically. 

 

I have received some advice though. One person told me to share our Google Calendars so we can see what is on the other person’s schedule. Another person said to make sure to take time for myself. Yet another said to not get bothered over the little stuff; boys are going to leave stuff out and not bother to pick them up all the time. 

 

People have had mixed reactions to me moving all the way to a different state just because my boyfriend lives there. Some are very excited and will sometimes even give me advice on where to visit, what to see or do. Others might give me a look and judge me for making such a big change for the sake of following my boyfriend. To that I always respond, sometimes a little snappy, “Sorry I want to be with the person I love.” 

 

But I always get the same questions: Do you have a job? (Not one that’s there, thank you, Eli, for letting me work remotely.) Do you have an apartment? (Yes, about 15 minutes southeast of downtown.) How do your parents feel? (Devastated, obviously, but also incredibly supportive.) Are you excited? (Absolutely.)

 

I have received so much support not only from my family and friends, but people I don’t personally know or have just met. Thank you to all of those people who help me realize no matter what happens, I will be fine. It’s okay that I don’t have any friends in Denver besides my boyfriend, I can easily make friends. It’s okay that I don’t have a job there in my profession, I have other ways of earning an income. It’s okay to move; getting out of the great state of Minnesota isn’t bad. Seeing the world, exploring what’s out there, is good. It’s good. 

 

I’ve gotten really sentimental the past week. As I’ve been packing and organizing, my childhood bedroom has been changing more than it ever has. I’m trying to cement in my memory the color of the walls, the smell of all my books, the feel of my bed. I’m trying to take in what it’s like to come home to our three happy dogs and wait for the rest of my family to get home. I’m trying to appreciate the night-time family routine of watching the news, chatting about our days at dinner, and enjoying each other’s company. 

 

And I’m filling up with anticipation for the future. The unknown of which mountain I might hike on a weekend. Which new food I might try, what fascinating event or festival I could go to. The unknown of what life holds. It’s exciting and nerve-racking and all-encompassing. 

 

So I will say goodbye to my family and friends. Goodbye to the town that raised me, the community that welcomed me. I will say goodbye to my surroundings — the mini forest I lived in, the clear stars I watched at night, and the tall corn that lets me know it’s time to go back to school. But I won’t be going back to school this time. If you look for me, I’ll be in Denver, Colorado. 

 

My Determination: “In my fantasy, I always thought I would slap someone, make a big speech, and storm out forever…but this is good too.” – Pam Beasley, The Office