Bewildered by the day

ECHOES FROM THE LOAFERS’ CLUB MEETING

I see you walking most days.

 

I walk every day. Nietzsche said, “All truly great thoughts are conceived by walking.”

 

I had a great thought while seeing you walk. Instead of walking 10,000 steps a day, I’m taking 100 steps a day for 100 days.

 

DRIVING BY BRUCE’S DRIVE

I have a wonderful neighbor named Bruce. Whenever I pass his drive, thoughts occur to me. I’ve given more eulogies than I can count. Not all succumbed to the maladies of age. Philip Roth wrote, “Old age isn't a battle: old age is a massacre.” After giving a recent tribute, I was driving home when I thought of the Burma-Shave signs. Burma-Shave was a shaving cream whose advertising campaign involved erecting six signs, each of the first five containing a line of verse and the sixth displaying the brand name. An example is: “On curves ahead/Remember, sonny/That rabbit’s foot/Didn’t save the bunny/Burma-Shave.” The former Los Angeles Dodgers manager Tommy Lasorda said, “Baseball is like driving, it's the one who gets home safely that counts.”

 

I was bewildered by the day. There are days when I can’t remember anything but passwords. I stopped to pick up a few groceries. I walked through the health food section on my way to the ice cream department. It made sense. I forgot a couple of passwords, but I remembered that a million seconds is 11.5 days and a billion seconds is 31.7 years.

 

I’VE LEARNED

Researchers at Delancey Street, a debt relief company, analyzed financial health across 48 states, using metrics like debt levels, credit scores, income and financial stress. Mississippi leads the list of most financially strained states, with the highest delinquency rate and low median income, alongside more than half of its residents reporting stress from price increases. Louisiana and Alabama follow, both showing high delinquency rates, declining credit scores, and widespread financial pressure. Nevada and Florida stand out for extreme debt-to-income ratios, suggesting many households are stretched thin. States like Georgia, Texas and Tennessee rank in the top 10, where moderate earnings are offset by high debt burdens and growing financial anxiety. Northern states dominate the least strained rankings. Vermont, Minnesota and New Hampshire benefit from low delinquency rates, strong credit scores, and lower levels of financial stress. North Dakota is the 40th most stressed state, Iowa is ranked 41st and Wisconsin 44th.

 

I had a Shetland pony. I named him Cough Drop because he was a little horse.

I led a tour on a cruise to Alaska. At one stop, while everybody got off for a shore excursion, I decided to stay on the ship with those who had lost a step and were unable to walk well enough to enjoy hoofing around a busy city. I sat with them on the deck of the ship. We watched whales, and I listened to their stories. It was fantastic. Last off, first whales. The Good Book says the last shall be first. When we get too busy, like the White Rabbit in “Alice's Adventures in Wonderland,” who carried a pocket watch and said, “I’m late! I’m late! For a very important date!” we need to slow down, take a good look at nature, and listen to the stories of others.

 

BAD JOKES DEPARTMENT

What do you call a Viking who had his driver’s license suspended? A Hiking.

 

Why shouldn't you kick a volcano? You might Krakatoa.

 

My days are backward. I wake up tired and go to bed wide awake.

 

NATURE NOTES

I listened to a brown thrasher and its gleeful, repeated musical phrases. I want to sing along, but I don’t know the words. I recited the human words from the mnemonic I’d learned in my youth. "Plant a seed, plant a seed; bury it, bury it; cover it up, cover it up; let it grow, let it grow; pull it up, pull it up; eat it, eat it."

 

I love watching the exploits of birds. Starlings insert their bills into the ground, then pry their mandibles open, creating a space to grab prey. I don’t mind seeing those birds. I’ve developed starling callouses.

 

I heard a spirited discussion in a tree and saw the coppertop battery of birds. The male brown-headed cowbird has a glossy black body with a dark brown head.

 

I gazed at a rose-breasted grosbeak eating sunflower seeds, cracking the hulls, and spitting them out before swallowing the hearts. It did so in an effortless way that would put any baseball player to shame.

 

MEETING ADJOURNED

“A part of kindness consists in loving people more than they deserve.”—Joseph Joubert.