Being a friend to your future self

On Thursday of last week I finished a two week course of antibiotics intended to fix my gut health. After two weeks I can report I still have pain in my gut, the usual kind. However, within three days of the antibiotic my back, which had not healed over 10 months, was about 50% better. By the end of week two of this treatment, my back was 90% healed. I am back to walking 10,000 plus steps a day and energy I didn’t know I had anymore has returned. Apparently chronic gut health issues can cause inflammation and malnutrition (i.e. being tired and not feeling yourself). The back and leg pain was inflammation in my back pushing against the sciatic nerve going into my leg, making me miserable. 

 

As someone who feels the need to make the most of every day, my version of that, these past almost four years now, since the chronic gut pain started, has looked different than the fairytale version I dream up. Speaking with people these past two weeks does not feel like a chore. I am participating in the community and honestly, to me, most importantly, moving again. Three weeks ago I found myself simply saying prayers asking for the ability to enjoy one more walk outside on a nice day. 

 

I am told even after taking this antibiotic for two weeks, it will still take my gut a couple weeks to recover from the damage done by the bacteria it killed off. To be frank, I am not hopeful nor do I believe it will fix the pain I am experiencing. I believe what was treated was something wrong with my GI, but likely not the entire problem. My physical therapist told me I am problematically optimistic because I’m always like, “it will get better.” 

 

We are told as people to let tomorrow worry for itself. That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t work towards making tomorrow better. 

 

I have follow up appointments and more tests to figure out this stomach stuff. I am praying that this energy that I haven’t felt since the first 18 or so months of running my Waseca newspaper is here to stay. One truly doesn’t know how good they have life until they lose something important. I have never been happier to walk in my entire life. Throughout these past two weeks, I was so happy to be able to walk without pain that I quite literally wanted to run. (I didn’t do that for health reasons.) 

 

As someone who doesn’t particularly enjoy staying in and watching television or playing video games, these past almost 10 months have been particularly difficult. I enjoy people and meaning. Sitting and doing nothing feels unfulfilling and not at all relaxing. 

 

My real message here is to people in good health. Enjoy walking. And also, enjoy being able to sit not in pain either, because that was also a literal pain in the butt. 

 

I think the keys to a happy life are to have a job or role in life that gives a person meaning, have friends and family and community; and finally have a self care routine, exercise, eating right, quality alone time and being a friend to your future self. Let tomorrow worry for itself and don’t stress about the little things.