Six miles from the front line, far from home

Two of my best friends, Kyle and Anastasiia, (both in their 30s) were in town visiting Monday and Tuesday. They are now permanent Floridians, but still have family in Southern Minnesota. 

 

Yesterday we had dinner together and spent the evening chatting. Anastasiia is from Ukraine. Her parents, Ihor and Alla, (both in their 60s) have moved here on a temporary emergency visa. 

 

In Ukraine, Ihor and Alla ran a coffee shop, which they were forced to relocate to the capital of Ukraine, Kyiv. Their town is only six miles from the front line currently being held by the Russians. Kyle told me, their shop was hit by a missile after they left. Anastasiia’s former high school was also hit by a number of missiles. She told me her mom graduated from the same school shortly after it was built. “Now it’s leveled,” she said.

 

Speaking with Anastasiia after I wrote this column, she sent me this message:

 

“Mom and Dad had a coffee shop and several coffee vending machines set up in different locations in my hometown and in the neighboring town. After the full scale invasion, they closed everything down and moved their equipment into storage. Once they relocated to Kyiv, they reoriented and reopened their vending business - now they have two locations with self-serve coffee stations. Everything else remains in storage. 

 

The missile hit directly on one of the spots where their coffee vending machine used to be (in my hometown).

 

The town is not currently captured by the Russians, but the front line is only about 6 miles away from it - and it is still moving. It is in range for artillery now, also, so it gets bombarded regularly.”

 

After much pleading, Ihor and Alla finally agreed to move in with Kyle and Anastasiia in Florida this year. (Although the process to move here actually started much sooner.) 

Ihor and Alla joined us at dinner. 

 

They do not speak English. 

 

After an awkward minute, we all got to conversating. (Anastasiia is a professional translator/interpreter.)

 

I asked them about their arrival in the United States, what surprised them most, what hurdles they face, what they like/dislike and finally, I asked about some of their personal perspectives–their relationship and what they thought of the “American boy” flying across the world to see and eventually marry their only daughter. 

 

Ihor and Alla met each other in college. Ihor was a “fifth year" and Alla was a “third year.” They met on a dance floor after Ihor had asked all of the other boys to let Alla dance with him. After dancing together, they became friends, and started dating. 

 

Their biggest surprise was how large everything is in America. Portion sizes, land, everything. They said people here talk all the time… to each other, strangers, even people at the grocery store. The fact that everyone smiles all the time surprised them. More shocking, they said, no one is in a hurry. Back home, everything is more rushed. Snap, snap, snap. Move, move, move. 

 

The biggest hurdle feels obvious: language. 

 

Their biggest dislike is the lack of vegetables in cooking. In Ukraine it is very common to have six or seven vegetables in a serving of soup. Here, everything is fried, they say. However, they did note that we have excellent access to fresh vegetables and high quality food in grocery stores… it just costs a little more, they said. 

 

As she anticipated her parents arriving in the United States, Anastasiia says she felt worry, anxiety. Despite having pre-approval to enter the U.S., they could have been turned away for any reason upon landing in Florida.  Thankfully, they answered the questions correctly, one of which was demanding the exact address of their residence. (Which they produced quickly.) 

Finally, the last questions I asked were in regards to Kyle and Anastasiia. 

 

Kyle met Anastasiia in high school when she was a foreign exchange student. Anastasiia claims she had a crush on Kyle right away. Part of her long story includes a vacation in Europe where she and her friend wrote the names of their crushes on a napkin with lipstick and threw it into the Black Sea. She wrote down Kyle's name. 

 

Nearly a decade after high school, Kyle and Anastasiia connected online, via Facebook. The two started talking; Anastasiia dared Kyle to come visit her in Ukraine. 

 

He did. 

 

Alla came with Anastasiia to the airport the day Kyle arrived.

 

Their love story could fill pages, but today, this will have to do. 

 

One trip led to a few more, including a trip where Kyle overstayed his visa and was interrogated at the airport for hours. Finally, Kyle sneaked a wedding ring through customs, fearing it would be confiscated or stolen by foreign customs agents. 

 

The two moved to the United States, married, and nearly two and half years ago had their first child, Odin. 

 

Alla said she was worried at first, but then Kyle arrived. She said his love for Anastasiia is great. This eased her heart. 

 

Speaking with Anastasiia’s parents is an experience I won’t ever forget. I’m grateful for the great relationships I am blessed with in this life. 

 

“If the only prayer you said was thank you, that would be enough.”

― Meister Eckhart